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cefnlh5 | If *everyone* ran *all the time* society would have been structured around it. People would be more fit and nimble as to avoid collisions, shelves would have lips on them to prevent the clumsy from just knocking things off, underground crosswalks would exist to not have to interrupt the flow of running pedestrians. W... | 1,745 | ceflivt | superdude4agze | AskReddit | 839 | 2014-01-02 11:19:38 | Yeah I was thinking the same thing. Could you imagine everyone running everywhere all the time? It'd be nuts! |
cenwqa5 | I guess the hardest part was your hardest part! | 1,744 | cenwhd8 | ILL_Show_Myself_Out | AskReddit | 1,089 | 2014-01-12 13:02:19 | Made it really easy to bang with her family in the house. Hardest part was hiding my boner. |
cf2wvt8 | > Spain is Europes Florida Holy shit, you're right. Warmer than other places in the area, surrounded by water, and full of people speaking Spanish. | 1,743 | cf2vojt | captain_zerg | AskReddit | 704 | 2014-01-30 11:19:41 | We very rarely go to Belarus. Better tell him it's like driving from Amsterdam to Madrid, that'll ring more bells. And Spain is Europes Florida, so it's fitting. |
cel67vg | I swore the bass was about to drop. | 1,741 | cel4uva | snackies | AskReddit | 982 | 2014-01-09 00:20:10 | I swore it was going to implode. |
ceeyua7 | The guy is a Denver-based Iraq war veteran who suffers from post-traumatic stress disorder. I can think of far worse people from a PR standpoint. EDIT: [Source](http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/01/01/sean-azzariti-marijuana-colorado_n_4519539.html) | 1,738 | ceexqbw | the92jays | funny | 867 | 2014-01-01 13:15:10 | AAAAAAND we lost the PR battle for legalization. |
ceiapgg | He takes care of sick beats. If that's not a doctor, I don't know what is. | 1,736 | cei9ot1 | arobi37 | AskReddit | 582 | 2014-01-05 17:11:18 | He's not *that* kind of doctor. Well, technically not the *other* kind either... |
cev2jas | If fashion is men wearing capris and soccer shirts then I'm fine being unfashionable. | 1,735 | cev1ovr | Zao1 | AskReddit | 765 | 2014-01-21 06:51:29 | TIL: American's lack a sense of fashion |
ceigb8z | They had jurisdiction in New Zealand not too long ago. Edit: thanks for the gold! | 1,735 | ceif919 | alcoholland | pics | 522 | 2014-01-05 20:36:16 | not sure if they have jurisdiction in Australia? :P |
cemre22 | http://i.imgur.com/2Sl78VP.jpg | 1,733 | cemqs7p | rommeltheg | WTF | 276 | 2014-01-10 21:46:50 | http://i.imgur.com/gfNpA.gif |
ceeiqyh | It's 2014, just make that shit wireless. | 1,731 | ceeg3qc | Rumler | AskReddit | 286 | 2013-12-31 18:33:33 | You'd rather have intestines running down your leg? No thanks. |
celxyop | If I'm being honest with myself... $800. | 1,730 | celuklc | [deleted] | AskReddit | 884 | 2014-01-09 21:46:02 | Eat a McDonald's Soft Serve out of another man's asshole |
cen569i | Knowing what that sentence means | 1,730 | cen4a2g | Josh_The_Boss | AskReddit | 1,084 | 2014-01-11 12:51:23 | 5 straight 20s with one d20 dice.. |
ceexmn0 | So do I, so do I... You should check out this hot redhead dancing solo: http://imgur.com/7t9mjiB Edit: someone just popped my GOLD cherry! You know, it's times like this that I go to the bathroom, stare in the mirror, and say to myself: I'm Good Enough, I'm Smart Enough, and Doggone It, People Like Me! | 1,728 | ceetddw | stomassetti | AskReddit | 712 | 2014-01-01 12:23:10 | [Favourite gif](http://i.imgur.com/dj1dr.gif) and [favourite image](http://i.imgur.com/LIPSl.jpg ). I like women who are extra womanly. |
cetfjuq | I couldn't afford a good school to know the difference. | 1,727 | cetfg62 | Hannibal_Rex | technology | 1,027 | 2014-01-19 08:06:18 | *affects |
ceo9r8j | Dude you were molested. Straight up. | 1,633 | ceo99bw | Vahnya | AskReddit | 705 | 2014-01-12 21:44:55 | She told me if I say something she will never talk to me again, so I let her to continue. Hugs and kiss were also involved and at age 11 she wanted me to bum her but I said no. Later we continued to have oral till she got married, I was15 at that time. |
cek2b56 | Or an inadequate bomb shelter. | 1,625 | cek21tx | [deleted] | WTF | 973 | 2014-01-07 17:39:00 | You must have an unbelievably powerful wireless router to get through all that concrete. |
ceny80p | they don't. they detach them and store them in the locker room. That's why some men become women if they wear speedos too much: they forget their penis and have to carry on life without one. Edit: ...and... my top comment is about penises and speedos. But at least it reminded people of Calvin and Hobbs, so I got that ... | 1,727 | cenwe5x | sanityaside | AskReddit | 912 | 2014-01-12 13:57:49 | First was when I was on a coed swim team and I walked in on a guy changing and saw it. He screamed but weirdly enough he got a boner. It looked and huge and scary to me. (I was 12) then I always wondered how they got them into speedos. |
ceitr0f | so will some people if you are lucky. | 1,668 | ceitldc | Ayn_Rand_Was_Right | explainlikeimfive | 590 | 2014-01-06 10:16:17 | Except dogs will lick each other's assholes. |
cewbit3 | Yup. | 1,726 | cewbi4m | Unidan | videos | 1,020 | 2014-01-22 14:43:39 | He's our local biologist. He's reddit famous and has been quoted via reddit in many online papers and publications. He seems like a genuinely good guy, but I am betting he's really an evil villain and in it for the long con. Am I right, /u/Unidan? |
cervwrt | Keep on Bergentrückun'. | 1,722 | cervl1e | someguyinahat | AskReddit | 757 | 2014-01-17 06:18:18 | German here... Wtf is Bergentrückung? You know I saw your explanation, but I never heard this word before. The rest that you wrote is true though. |
cemllrj | **Taric's Hammer** Catalyst The Protector + Phage + Pickaxe + 100g 1200+1325+875+100=3500g * +400 HP * +300 Mana * +50 Attack Damage * Unique Passive – Rage: Basic attacks grant 20 movement speed for 2 seconds on hit. Minion, monster, and champion kills grant 60 movement speed for 2 seconds. The movement speed bonus... | 1,720 | cemksu3 | AP_YI_OP | leagueoflegends | 415 | 2014-01-10 17:11:35 | Catalyst+phage=A good nicheitem out of two other nicheitems :D Make it happen riot...pls :) E: I mean this item could probably be food for a lot of the top-laners that use mana, like irelia or something. Gaining both mana and big amount of hp. |
ceezg9h | Suggesting that law enforcers prioritize their actions based on importance is beyond laughable. | 1,719 | ceezdgd | Col_Volkov | funny | 1,045 | 2014-01-01 13:41:52 | Theoretically, yes he could be arrested by a Fed, but they usually have more important things to do |
ceiq63i | Horngry. | 1,718 | ceintq3 | qboned | AskReddit | 1,109 | 2014-01-06 07:54:37 | Great, now I'm hungry *and* horny. |
cer99do | "Veterans go for headshots." | 1,717 | cer7aj4 | nerf_waffles | AskReddit | 852 | 2014-01-16 11:49:27 | Oh god, I finally got to the end of that level after 50-or-so tries. I shoot the final guy in the leg because that works on the easier difficulties, and I get the fail screen for not shooting him in the head. |
ceruhym | What do you call a leisure centre in the US? Nothing, because wtf is a leisure centre | 1,717 | certqzn | danrennt98 | AskReddit | 865 | 2014-01-17 04:44:15 | What do the Welsh call a sheep tied to a pole? A leisure centre. |
cewflt0 | You just described everyone's GTA experience. | 1,714 | cewcout | rafiislost | AskReddit | 735 | 2014-01-22 17:10:00 | I would go to a military base. Shoot a bunch of guns then teach myself how to fly a helicopter. Land in front of an exotic car dealership and go on a few joyrides in high-end cars before getting back in the helicopter. When the fuel gets low, I would jump from the helicopter, without a parachute. That would be one h... |
ceeynyn | Well, he wasn't wrong. Just uninvited. | 1,714 | ceey4nt | RandomMandarin | AskReddit | 901 | 2014-01-01 13:07:39 | haha this reminds me of my first serious girlfriend. Her dog would always jump up on the couch and start humping one of us whenever we were being inappropriate. |
ceg1f87 | >donuts Cops were already on scene. Edit: Ugh, this hacky comment? Why, Reddit, why? | 1,714 | ceg0f1r | Mookyhands | AskReddit | 431 | 2014-01-02 20:10:01 | Who the fuck calls the cops on a kid who steals donuts. What are they communist?! |
cekbi0l | >>the mushroom death suit by Infinity Burial Project. Metal album of the year. | 1,713 | cekba77 | grandomegaboss | AskReddit | 317 | 2014-01-08 00:42:48 | >New methods in development include promession, and the mushroom death suit by Infinity Burial Project. WTF is a mushroom death suit? Edit: Holy inbox, Batman. I think I regret my question. Edit: Second question -- if my friends eat my death-mushrooms, will I live on inside of them, or will they just get high? |
cegji5h | Rap famous | 1,710 | cegjfh9 | tonzko520 | todayilearned | 978 | 2014-01-03 12:23:21 | How famous was Will Smith when the show first aired? |
cek9spc | WHY ARE YOU HAMMERING NAILS INTO PIPES??? | 1,709 | cek9gr9 | [deleted] | WTF | 863 | 2014-01-07 22:42:24 | Nailed it. |
cew6kr8 | I'm just glad the train didn't derail, flinging tiny toddler bodies in all directions, a delayed explosion, and little Tommy lying motionless on the ground with his younger brother shaking him "wake up Tommy, why won't you wake up?" As the paramedics arrive on scene and take away his little corpse his brother screams i... | 1,709 | cew5iju | terriblenames | videos | 667 | 2014-01-22 12:05:25 | I was actually surprised by the damage that mini-train was able to do... Little thing packs a punch! |
ceylv15 | Boom, home vasectomy. | 1,709 | ceylrlt | Prof_Frink_PHD | AskReddit | 804 | 2014-01-25 09:16:14 | And then, a random sneeze out of nowhere! |
cewvke8 | There is 1 thousand metres in a kilometre. One oh oh oh. 1000 metre in one kilometre. | 1,705 | cewu4n3 | TheBlackBurrito | AskReddit | 887 | 2014-01-23 07:50:28 | There are 5 tomatoes in a mile. Five two eight oh. 5280 feet in one mile. |
ceoxroh | So the devil on your shoulder was like - *You just killed her, with your PENIS!* but the Angel on your shoulder was like - You just KILLED her, with your penis! | 1,705 | ceov1w8 | scurrdofsharks | AskReddit | 799 | 2014-01-13 18:03:32 | This happened to my ex girlfriend. She has a tendency to faint when she feels above average pain. I stuck it in her ass on accident when I was fucking her up against her sink. She passed out and fell and I took a knee and caught her. I thought I had killed her for the next 2-3 seconds. |
cezvl5h | WHAT? WHERE? | 1,705 | cezvhlz | juanjing | WTF | 683 | 2014-01-26 22:03:32 | I know but there are many other vaginas on the internet to fap to... |
cetdvjg | You're still not controlling it. Whoever releases the crane is. Unless you also did that somehow. Then I think it's Craneslaughter. | 1,669 | cetdca0 | TheNumberMuncher | AskReddit | 727 | 2014-01-19 06:23:51 | What if you were sitting in the drivers seat and survived the impact but he didn't? |
cf0d1bw | I'm in Texas. Pretty sure the punishment upgrades from jail time to "shot by homeowner" if you get caught. | 1,704 | cf0besd | Falterfire | AskReddit | 738 | 2014-01-27 13:39:10 | Yep. Burglary doesn't carry _as_ much time if you get caught compared to when there's an actual confrontation involved. Going to greatly increase the severity of your punishment. That's why most burglars prefer to case neighborhoods first and figure out when houses are empty. Edited for clarity: Burglary is a serious... |
cesbng0 | Let's get him a TV show. We can call it *Held at Funpoint*. | 1,703 | ces9itd | [deleted] | WTF | 1,093 | 2014-01-17 16:14:24 | I love this kid already |
cewgqvr | How oddly American. NSA overreach, misled wars, years of the war on drugs, and what gets Americans out in the streets for a huge protest? Fucking Netflix. | 1,702 | ceweta2 | Gomazing | worldnews | 743 | 2014-01-22 17:50:56 | netflix could replace every video for a month with a picture of Washington dc with a time and date organizing the Americans greatest protest of all tme |
ceeix7e | He had $600 he had to get out of that pussy. | 1,700 | ceeirc9 | Learned_Hand_01 | AdviceAnimals | 665 | 2013-12-31 18:42:37 | Why the fuck did you wait a week?? |
cexq4vi | >Foreskin cookers ??? This sounds scary. | 1,699 | cexq0vy | KoolGMatt | AskReddit | 916 | 2014-01-24 07:01:29 | Try a *tosta mista* (I fucking hate those words too). Slice of bread, a fuckton of white cheese, and then another slice of bread. Toast it in one of those Foreskin cookers until the cheese is gooey and stringy. Its fucking blissful. I'd eat it all the time in Brazil and Portugal.
Edit: I meant Foreman cooker, not fore... |
cezb474 | 20% written, 30% oral and 50% ANAL. | 1,699 | cez9l4o | 0xD153A53 | AskReddit | 372 | 2014-01-26 08:31:35 | > history of pornography What was the final like in this class? |
ceqn867 | But... *you're* OP. | 1,697 | ceqfvh8 | space_bird | AskReddit | 796 | 2014-01-15 17:21:53 | Good pic, OP |
cf3jkx7 | Which is the marginally more bleak sequel to Orwell's 1984. *Edit: Thanks to whoever gilded this. Once again, I am humbled.* | 1,697 | cf3ji5z | magicbullets | pics | 983 | 2014-01-31 05:01:59 | Hi, Russian here! Norilsk is actually a really imortant city, even though it looks like a shithole. A lot of palladium, colbat, copper, nickel, and platinum is mined here, so technically it's a rare metal powerhouse. Too bad it looks like something from George Orwell's 1985. |
ceim7uc | Because he was fucking hungry? | 1,696 | ceim3ik | KeepthecarrunningFoo | AskReddit | 817 | 2014-01-06 02:48:34 | Why would you go make breakfast at the start of a mission? |
celxqq0 | Around the World in 80 Lays | 1,625 | celw1t0 | Flobocop | AskReddit | 1,034 | 2014-01-09 21:35:30 | Gotta go around the world. White, black, Hispanic, Asian, Indian, Middle Eastern, and somehow, someday... Native American. |
cewvqdl | Once overheard a coworker: "B as in Brad, R as in Rad, A as in Add, D as in Dad" to a customer over the phone asking to spell his name. | 1,685 | cewudlg | weavves | AskReddit | 681 | 2014-01-23 07:56:52 | I usually say the word "[Sam]", then "S as in Sam, A as in Sam..." |
ceuoeqm | "thank you: you have rated our customer service - 9 Our network coverage - 9 Value for money - 9 Overall service - 9 Have a great day" *click | 1,684 | ceuo2p2 | IOnlyUpvoteBadPuns | technology | 1,065 | 2014-01-20 17:26:17 | Just yell NEIN NEIN NEIN to that question. They will get it. |
cevzblz | http://i.imgur.com/5X29xlu.png | 1,683 | cevyly2 | Squalor- | WTF | 434 | 2014-01-22 07:45:30 | /u/Squalor- , now also providing Porn info. |
ceteikz | I am sorry to be the one to tell you this but your bird is actually a hamster. | 1,679 | cetbdzs | oxfordtwiel | AskReddit | 433 | 2014-01-19 07:07:41 | Are you a bird expert by any chance? Because one of my pet birds forgot how to fly. I mean, he used to be able to fly, but then we haven't let them out of the cage in a while and now, these past couple of months, he's either forgotten how to or he's just too afraid to try. I wonder what happened to him. When we let him... |
cejfvy2 | Ha. So both | 1,679 | cejflps | mr_suppaman_not_here | AskReddit | 320 | 2014-01-07 00:12:19 | Filipino |
cf3bj1r | It's the whole "private strip show" mentality of it. I can watch free porn... or I can get this girl to strip *for me*. Not that I would pay that much, but I understand what the appeal is. EDIT: I get it guys, there are other ways to achieve sexual gratification. I was just explaining this particular one. Jesus. ED... | 1,677 | cf3b3y7 | buster2Xk | AskReddit | 1,065 | 2014-01-30 19:50:55 | There's like... Really good stuff for free though.. I don't get it. |
ceqi14u | Cause he didn't give a shit. | 1,670 | ceqhusw | [deleted] | AskReddit | 875 | 2014-01-15 14:21:37 | Well it was after football practice. My friend was a little...unbalanced? In an amusing way. He actually went on to be pretty successful in school. |
cf17l4y | I'll just copy/paste my comment [here](http://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/1t8yu8/redditors_who_have_been_here_since_reddit_started/ce5k4kb). I've been around (lurking, at least) for about 6 years now. So not since the beginning, but certainly longer than most. It's hard to describe exactly how it has gone dow... | 1,670 | cf17ihs | karmanaut | AskReddit | 413 | 2014-01-28 12:58:07 | Has it gotten worse or is it that we've just seen the same thing over and over again that things that we would have found awesome five years ago lost their luster? I'm hardly impressed by anything I see just because I've seen something comparable to it a hundred times before. |
cetzruy | http://i.imgur.com/pBsnCve.jpg | 1,668 | cetysn7 | AWildSketchAppeared | videos | 627 | 2014-01-19 21:27:51 | You're right, he does look like Chris Johnson. |
cf0a9wq | The trick is to find someone who's worth sitting online that little bit longer for | 1,667 | cf0a319 | iGoByManyNames | videos | 750 | 2014-01-27 12:08:02 | To have the patience to trawl through 10,000 teddy bears is incredible. |
cf0wha0 | Shrek survived on shear woolpower. Edit: Thanks for the gold! | 1,666 | cf0u6rd | Barry_McKackiner | pics | 728 | 2014-01-28 06:06:29 | "Shrek the sheep ran away and hid in a cave in New Zealand for 6 years. When Shrek was finally found in 2004, the sheep had gone unsheared for so long that it had accumulated 60 pounds of wool on its body, enough to make 20 suits! The sheep became famous and even got to meet the Prime Minister. Shrek finally passed awa... |
ces9m3k | Actually the IRS is EXCELLENT on the phone. Have never had an issue. They courteous, polite and VERY WILLING to resolve your issues. All of these commercials every five minutes scaring you that they are the devil are not true at all. If you owe them ANY amount, they will work with you to resolve it VERY QUICKLY! T... | 1,666 | ces6pgy | quijanog | AskReddit | 913 | 2014-01-17 14:50:35 | [Comcast's customer service rate has actually been LOWER than the IRS!](http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Criticism_of_Comcast#section_2) |
cefz0ir | It may be just me, but I thought it was making fun of all the tits they show by switching the fixation to weiners. Edit: highest upvoted comment yet, and it contains the word "weiners". Of course. | 1,665 | cefwv68 | JDeMorgan | AskReddit | 832 | 2014-01-02 18:44:58 | On that note, I thought it was really weird that South Park acted so smug lampooning GoT's weiner fixation when there's really been maybe two or three dicks in the entire series, plus one or two gay sex scenes back in season 1. There's so much in the show ripe for parody and that's the best they could do? Edit: just ... |
ceeryl6 | Um, leeches and maggots are used more often in modern medicine than you think. And they're very effective at what they do. | 1,665 | ceerjts | PacManDreaming | AskReddit | 778 | 2014-01-01 07:51:11 | Radiation treatment is fairly effective at combating cancer. Leeches aren't effective in combating jack shit. They wouldn't view it as strange, they'd view it as an imperfcect solution. |
cew6g2i | He's gonna get so married. | 1,663 | cew6czu | SwearWords | pics | 818 | 2014-01-22 12:00:56 | Orthodox priests can be married I think. |
cev21vn | Funny thing: as an American who travels a lot, upon hearing my accent I've had more than a few folks ask me first if I was Canadian. When I say no, American, and ask if Canadians are more common I will be told "no, but when I guess American based on accents a lot of Canadians will get mad even though I can't tell the ... | 1,662 | cev1i6f | Andromeda321 | AskReddit | 837 | 2014-01-21 06:27:35 | His language - accent. Also outgoing, friendly. |
cerw7kj | They've been coasting on that one accomplishment for 200 years now. EDIT: Guys I know they don't have taxes stop telling me that | 1,633 | cervfz4 | BBanner | AskReddit | 889 | 2014-01-17 06:33:47 | Delaware was the first State to ratify the Constitution! Now you know something. Knowledge is power. |
cek7j9k | D Wade travels.... Back to 1953. | 1,631 | cek70fn | JJX119 | nba | 459 | 2014-01-07 20:55:25 | Why are you posting a black and white gif? |
cf05z9i | That was manager for "Stop doing things that makes me have to do things" | 1,630 | cf02hnj | [deleted] | AskReddit | 861 | 2014-01-27 09:36:42 | At work one day a woman asked for a iced green tea with light ice. She made it a really big deal that she wanted light ice. I was still somewhat new and asked my co-worker how much ice was considered light. I made the joke that maybe we should use little ice cubes and we laughed about it. This woman overheard us and bl... |
cepmjkp | Yes | 1,629 | cepkvoj | Dvalenz42 | AskReddit | 420 | 2014-01-14 14:18:59 | Nicolas Cage. Do we love him or hate him?! |
cezht0t | That's what SpaceShrimp said, below average. | 1,627 | cezhj1a | TheTijn68 | pics | 571 | 2014-01-26 13:03:56 | I thought it meant that he is half danish. |
cefgmmy | 1. Do you like it sweet? 2. Why did you betray England? 3. When will they hang you for treason? | 1,627 | ceffmrk | beastlymoo13 | AskReddit | 825 | 2014-01-02 06:19:58 | We just drink hot tea on a regular basis. It's got nothing to do with cooling ourselves down. I personally do like some ice tea on a hot day. |
ceeszhf | This guy doesn't know how to use the 3 seashells. Ha! | 1,594 | ceessbl | sharterthanlife | AskReddit | 322 | 2014-01-01 08:52:53 | What on earth is this and why are there four comments about it...? |
ceeiga9 | Nope. Everyone has officially gone bananas. Edit: Reddit is confirmed to be bananas because this comment was gilded.......-_- | 1,626 | ceeievj | skyman724 | gaming | 526 | 2013-12-31 18:17:19 | Has no one heard of a fucking ruler? Edit: Seriously? One would think that after the top comment about a banana was gilded people would stop posted the same damn thing but noooooooooooooooooooooooo, 8 more fucking banana comments, some worded exactly the same or with the same fucking link. Are you so fucking despera... |
cefd8eh | No conspiracy here, just politics. The police didn't actually cremate the body (the headline is misleading - read the full article. That's why Times of India is called ToIlet paper - it's like Daily Fail of India). The girl's father is a member of the Centre of Indian Trade Unions (CITU), a trade union arm of the the ... | 1,662 | cefazn3 | MajorPolstan | worldnews | 411 | 2014-01-02 00:48:22 | Could ikt be the police were involved? Didn't want the DNA sampled? |
cf042he | I just wish someone would do it without adding "you're making a scene". | 1,660 | cf025o2 | Nyarlathotep124 | AskReddit | 512 | 2014-01-27 08:25:22 | I fucking love it when people unironically call me 'Sir'. |
cef2qsb | Bet it made certain parts of the OP... Quiver. | 1,659 | cef2dvv | QuickestSilver | AskReddit | 392 | 2014-01-01 16:05:06 | This would turn me on a LOT, not gonna lie. |
cenc6dx | http://i.imgur.com/X8n9xfr.jpg | 1,657 | cenb815 | cyniclawl | pics | 864 | 2014-01-11 17:39:41 | Since I know someone will ask...he's at the BC SPCA shelter in Quesnel, BC, Canada. The docs figure he was squished up against one of his siblings in the womb. ...I think he's judging me. |
cegztuo | Be really, really, ridiculously good looking | 1,657 | cegz7sx | saltymirv | aww | 337 | 2014-01-03 23:53:28 | How does one get a non-janitorial, vendor, not-animal-related job at a zoo? |
cf31cwp | > I accidentally got drunk Whoops, spilled that beer directly down my throat. How clumsy! | 1,655 | cf2u3rx | ukmhz | AskReddit | 697 | 2014-01-30 13:43:26 | I accidentally got drunk and traded my $8000 r1 for an English bulldog puppy. Probably would have killed myself by now on the r1 and I have the sweetest little cuddle buddy ever. |
ceete0b | Don't listen to him, he's talking shit. The 90's were less than 10 years ago. | 1,654 | ceet1vo | voidful | AskReddit | 1,015 | 2014-01-01 09:13:57 | > and that was just 20 years ago :( |
cehaq5d | http://imgur.com/zzrRUqs,79lfA2F The ring finger does not straighten. -Live long and Deliver. | 1,653 | ceh9p4m | middlefingerless | pics | 658 | 2014-01-04 11:42:14 | What does it look like? |
ceimmy1 | Why would you press LT? That's not the PEW PEW PEW button. | 1,652 | ceiktrk | ThomasBombadilius | AskReddit | 992 | 2014-01-06 03:35:39 | Similar experience, me and my friends were playing Black Ops when a friend yelled,"Wait, you can aim? I thought it was like Halo." Apparently he never watches kill cams...or press LT. I'm still confused on how that happens. |
cetwn4m | Well, Skip Bayless has really only destroyed sports journalism. I'm not sure what else beyond that. | 1,651 | cetwdnh | navybro | videos | 968 | 2014-01-19 19:22:41 | He does this kind of stuff all the time. He told Skip Bayless on espn first take that he "has never accomplished anything" in [this](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j6x-O3kb1sI) interview. |
cehm2r7 | Yews, he had to walk all the way back to Draynor and bank before he could start cutting again. | 1,650 | cehkjkl | t3hmilkman923 | gaming | 992 | 2014-01-04 20:10:33 | What are those trees made of such that you have to drive hours to cut down a single tree, then repeat the entire process for a different tree? They better have cream filling, or something. EDIT: Thanks for the input everyone. |
cegnb5o | >Oh and I've caught the CLAP at least 3 times now. Dude. Learn from your mistakes. | 1,649 | cegmkeu | [deleted] | AskReddit | 1,090 | 2014-01-03 14:43:57 | When I was 16 I went out to apply for jobs with a female friend one summer. One thing lead to another and we slept together, twice, before I returned home. Couple weeks later I get an itch (OH NO!). My parents end up finding out before I could make it to the free clinic (OH NO!). So I go to the doctor and get tested. ... |
cen6fpf | Keep a full glass of water next to it, and dump it over your head when you turn your alarm off. | 1,649 | cen6d3l | way_fairer | AskReddit | 916 | 2014-01-11 13:45:28 | Keep a full glass of water next to it, and chug it when you turn your alarm off. |
cf1c7ak | Like, 20 tater tots, at least. | 1,408 | cf1ardt | ReferencesCartoons | AskReddit | 423 | 2014-01-28 15:34:36 | How much can you fit in them? ಠ_ಠ |
cezqegr | You can be be arrested at age 18 for minor consumption in the US. On a related note... I used to intern at a juvenile probation department, and once I had a kid who went to party the night before her 18th birthday. There was alcohol at the party and it got busted shortly before midnight. She made sure she was one of th... | 1,647 | cezp9es | girllwholived | AskReddit | 589 | 2014-01-26 18:34:42 | Why would everyone be arrested? Shouldn't they just be cited? |
cf1uyz0 | [Let me clean you.](http://i.imgur.com/aVCDU3m.gif) | 1,647 | cf1uepe | Captain_McFiesty | photoshopbattles | 1,065 | 2014-01-29 08:17:06 | [Yeah, that looks like lice, sir.](http://imgur.com/8WGzHYO.jpg) |
cezirdr | "Did you see..." "Yeah..." *Every conversation ever with you and your friends.* | 1,645 | cezg4s0 | Jabberminor | AskReddit | 1,027 | 2014-01-26 13:40:02 | When I got my friends into Reddit. We have nothing new to talk about these days. |
cezbkl1 | Sorry about that... | 1,644 | cezbh2k | Snuffy1717 | talesfromtechsupport | 716 | 2014-01-26 08:53:19 | I'm still skeptical. There wasn't an apology anywhere in your entire post. |
cetbmoc | t-... Tom Cruise? | 1,642 | cetaqsi | stratus1469 | AskReddit | 583 | 2014-01-19 02:22:03 | What small/stupid question would you like answered, but isn't worthy of its own thread? |
cf2toak | What country has won *all* the Stanley Cups since 1993? That's right...USA USA USA | 1,641 | cf2tbc4 | snotbowst | AskReddit | 797 | 2014-01-30 09:32:39 | As a Canadian, you crediting the NHL to the Yanks made my eye twitch. |
cer7kwb | Some people actually prefer amature porn rather than professional. | 1,640 | cer7359 | Color_blinded | pics | 523 | 2014-01-16 10:52:21 | don't show this to /r/cableporn |
cew4s79 | They've been going on for 2 months - starting on November 21^**1**. They were first instigated by Ukrainian President Yanukovych's "abrupt" refusal to sign on to a pact with the EU, a move apparently that took place after Russia placed pressure on him to refuse^**7**. Protesters were removed from the square (Maidan Ne... | 1,639 | cew41q3 | nkryik | worldnews | 475 | 2014-01-22 11:04:46 | How long have these protests been going on and why am I only seeing a lot of news on them today? EDIT: To all the people saying "Because you haven't been paying attention" well, obviously... that's why I'm asking... |
ceg0bnm | [All of us.](http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/c/c0/Hurleylost.PNG/250px-Hurleylost.PNG) edit: so my highest rated comment is a joke about me wanting to see Hurley naked. Hooray. | 1,638 | cefz6md | TheCitationNeeded | AskReddit | 253 | 2014-01-02 19:31:26 | Seconded. [We](http://images.digitalspy.co.uk/10/05/550w_cult_lost_sayid_jarrah.jpg) all [have](http://img2-1.timeinc.net/ew/dynamic/imgs/080514/lost-mysteries/mr-alpert_l.jpg) our [reasons](https://p.gr-assets.com/540x540/fit/hostedimages/1380335083/694166.jpg) |
ceoovze | Psychology teacher kills himself. Philosophy teacher wonders why. | 1,638 | ceojsvu | [deleted] | AskReddit | 796 | 2014-01-13 12:35:49 | Our psychology teacher committed suicide. This messed me up for a long time. As a 15 year old, I just couldn't understand. |
cf2v4au | ...and you thought that after visiting PHILLY? damn. | 1,635 | cf2sag6 | jseego | AskReddit | 651 | 2014-01-30 10:21:14 | to me it the sense of citizenship (spelling maybe?). i come from a place where everyone throws garbage to the streets, where no one obeys a traffic signal, where people die for running across highways when a bridge is 4 meters away from them. when i visited philadelphia, i felt like everyone there really cared for t... |
cepbh6i | > Or something like that anyway, it could all be bollocks for all I know. This should be automatically added to every AskReddit post. | 1,625 | ceparaz | meepmeep13 | AskReddit | 1,032 | 2014-01-14 07:47:11 | I'm probably misremembering QI but I think one episode they explained how since the Chinese and Japanese drank tea, and developed materials like china to drink it from, they overlooked glass somewhat and as a result their eminent minds were forced to retire earlier than their European counterparts due to failing eyesig... |
cerpf1z | What happens when you run out of food? All of a sudden you're inexperienced, have no idea of the highly dangerous zones, you're now fresh meat to the already acclimatized cannibal autocracy. I say you don't fucking hide. You head to the ghettos because they will probably hit the gated communities at the break of da... | 1,624 | cerp067 | mach-2 | videos | 808 | 2014-01-16 21:44:23 | Just relog, that'll do the trick. |
ceyoyoc | You say what your lawyer tells you to say, buddy. | 1,623 | ceyos5q | Mister_Lurker | tifu | 586 | 2014-01-25 11:31:00 | Yeah. There's nothing in this post that I wouldn't say in a court of law, if it comes to that. |
cef9idd | Have you tried turning her off and on again? | 1,623 | cef6xqs | me1505 | AskReddit | 352 | 2014-01-01 21:02:14 | Man I still can't get mine to cum :( I considered myself an expert until I met my new GF.... I'm all out of tricks. |
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