Dear Cary, I'm writing because I've understood you've struggled with alcoholism  . I've been fighting mine ever since I went through 9-11. After that, I've been more or less useless. Professionally, I'm a lawyer, and have had to leave my job because I passed out  , drunk in front of my computer. I've taken some medicine and it has helped somewhat. I can manage about a month without drinking, but after that I end up having a crazy stage where nothing matters except drinking. After a week or so of heavy drinking, I start having nightmares of people jumping. After that, it's a week of not being able to get out of bed. I was supposed to travel to a conference but didn't make it because I got so drunk at the airport that I fell down on my face and spent the rest of the day in the emergency room. I have been hiding from my family since then. Fortunately they won't be expecting me to come back for a week or so. Otherwise, they would notice the bump   on my forehead and two black eyes. I don't really know what I'm asking you about. Cary, I need a way out that doesn't cause pain to my family. I'm taking medicine, but I still have these attacks every few months. If there's alcohol in the house, I can't stay away from it. It seems that this will never end. I'm worried about what will happen if something bad happens, like a family member dying, or getting fired again.  Thanks for reading.  Yours T What is the author worried about?
Losing his temper. Missing the conference. Bringing pain to his family. Giving up drinking.