Parents everywhere praise their kids when they do well in school, win a ball game, or build an impressive sandcastle --- anytime their kids do something remarkable  , or in many cases, something ordinary. "We are becoming praise junkies as parents", says Jenn Berman, PhD, a marriage and family expert and the author of The A to Z Guide to Raising Happy and Confident Kids. "We have gone to the opposite extreme   of the parents from a few decades ago who tended to be more strict, and now we overpraise our children." "Somehow parents have come to believe that by praising our kids we improve their self-esteem  ," says Paul Donahue, founder and director of Child Development Associates. "Though well-intentioned, putting kids on a pedestal   at an early age can actually hinder   their growth." Too much praise can backfire  , it seems, and when given in a way that's insincere, kids are afraid to try new things or take a risk for fear of not being on the top all the time. "There's an underlying   message that the child has to get his parents' approval all the time and constantly depends on the parents for validation  ," says Berman. Still, don't go too far in the other direction --- not giving enough praise which can be just as damaging as giving too much. Kids will feel like they are not good enough, or that you don't care, and may see no sense in reaching for their success. So what's the right amount of praise? Experts say that the quality of praise is more important than the quantity: if praise is sincere and genuine, and focused on the effort, not the outcome, you can give it as often as your child does something that is worth a reward. What kinds of parents can be regarded as praise junkies?
Those who praise their children too much. Those who seldom praise their children. Those who give sincere praise to their children. Those who offer their children dangerous drugs.