You feel happiest when you create a healthy balance between giving and receiving. If you give and give without making time to fill your own needs, then it's likely you will burn out, or feel upset .When you take and take without giving anything back ,you never feel fulfilled, so you are always searching for ways to fill the _ in your life. The way to create a healthy balance between giving and receiving is to know and then live by your values .I break values up into two groups which I call being and having values. Your being values are the character traits of the ideal person you would like to be. I suggest to my clients that they choose three being values that they are willing to make a commitment to live by. An example of some being values are: kind, loving, generous, inspirational, peaceful, wise and even powerful. By acting on these values you give to others through your actions and you inspire others by being a positive role model. Mastering being these character traits becomes your life purpose. Your having values are the feelings you need to create in order to be happy. These could be companionship, achievement, support, being valued or financial security. This is what you receive. You take responsibility for filling your own needs by taking steps to create these feelings and conditions in your life. When you make a commitment to live by your being values, it becomes easier to make conscious choices rather than reactionary ones. If your usual pattern is to talk about your problems, you could choose to think and act like a calm person. A calm person might go for a walk, meditate, or set a time limit before responding. If your usual pattern is to worry, you could choose to act like a responsible or wise person. In other words, you would act like the person you choose to be--this is the key to personal power. When you choose to act on your values, you not only feel good about yourself, you reinforce your chosen beliefs. Over time acting in this way changes how you see the world, and in turn the way other people think of you. What can be inferred from the text?
Having values are better than being values. The way other people think of you decides who you are. A calm person does not choose to complain. A responsible person does not care about financial security.